i tripped over a bra today
i think it was a booby trap
And, of course, there's the familiar "boom" of the cannon
Did you lie at the audition?
"People are built the way they are built. You know there’s that quote from Kate Moss that’s like: "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels". And I’m like, I can name a lot of things that taste better than skinny feels!”
why cant we text the police
lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you…
wait if eve ate the apple then why the fuck is it called an adam’s apple
because she ate the apple, and then convinced adam to eat the apple as well so that she wouldn’t be alone, but the piece he bit off got stuck in his throat.
It got stuck because at the exact moment he was swallowing, God jumped out from behind a bush like
“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!”
Can someone read his lips here??
I think he’s apologising. “I’m sorry, I can’t” (?) Probably to his fans who wanted an autograph, but he has no time to stop by.